In our practice we meet couples who want something more in their relationship. Some are trying to regain the past passion for each other and others are trying to survive as a couple. The turning point for most couples is not resolving certain disagreements and conflicts, but finding new ways to connect and overcome challenges together.
The EFT therapist helps the couple understand how each partner contributes to and participates in a recurring negative pattern of interaction - a "negative dance/ vicious cycle" that leads to insecurity, frustration, tension and distance. The therapist helps the partners break the "negative dance" and create a positive, secure and intimate relationship.
Emotionally focused therapy carries the message that people can have happy and fulfilling relationships. It's more than a clinically proven approach that helps couples experience deeper intimacy and deepen trust and feelings of safety with each other.
Through Emotionally Focused Therapy, people develop the ability to manage their emotions instead of letting their emotions manage them. With the guidance of a well-trained EFT therapist, they learn to identify, experience, accept, explore, transform and manage their emotions. As a result, they become more adept at responding appropriately to emerging situations and more satisfied in their relationships.
The founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy - Dr. Sue Johnson - speaks about the method:
"Love has the tremendous ability to heal the devastating wounds that life sometimes serves us. Love enhances our sense of connectedness to the wider world. The ability to respond with love is the foundation of a truly compassionate civilized society."
Dr. Sue Johnson
Theoretical foundations
The theoretical roots of EFT are embedded in the Systems Approach, which outlines and explores patterns of communication and behaviour between partners. Also, EFT uses the framework of Attachment Theory to achieve an understanding of the needs of mature loving relationships, adding several techniques from Experiential Therapy. At its core, EFT is a therapeutic model that contains and blends three approaches:
- Attachment Theory
- Intrapersonal - experiential
- Interpersonal - systems approach
The effectiveness and validity of EFT are supported by robust research
Numerous studies on the effectiveness of EFT for couples have demonstrated the significant therapeutic impact and durability of treatment results over time. Partners learn to understand their emotions and those of the other, leading them to sustainable fulfilling relationships. The method has been used successfully with couples in North and South America, Europe, Australia, New Zealand, Africa, Asia, the Balkans, regardless of cultural, educational or sexual background.